Friday, November 2, 2018

Samson

Life has been moving too fast. Too many moving parts. Slowing body. Maybe a slowing mind.

I have been remiss in writing about a very quiet, soulful companion in my midst. And, I am feeling badly that I am just doing this.

Samson
You see, Samson became a part of my family and work on December 26, 2016. Another rescue collie with low vision and entering his mid-life, at 6 yrs of age. A sweet, anxious but quiet guy. Big guy for a collie at 78 lbs when I first got him. Down from 100 lbs when the rescue folks took him in and fostered him for 8 months. He's weighing in at 68 and with muscle loss this summer/fall. Slowing down. Hearing worse, vision about gone. He's only 8 yrs old now.

His story was that a family got him and put him in a small backyard pen. They fed and watered him. He's never really responded to his name. They never realized that he had low vision. A neighbor encouraged them to surrender him to Collie Rescue Inc. where they worked to socialize, groom and provide physical care for him.

It had been almost one year since Finn had passed when I was ready to have another dog. That time coincided with his availability.

Other than his anxiety with being left alone and thunderstorms, he is a very gentle, quiet soul. I learned early on that he could be trusted to be in the counseling session with me, seeking a pet on the head, and then lying down. He also let children play with him, brush his hair and read to him in sessions.

He's been such a sweet guy.

And now he's entering some pretty serious health issues. No clear diagnosis since this summer. But it's now clear that his life is winding down. This week it came to a head. Vets. Urgent care vet centers. Mixed diagnosis. Xrays showing big changes. Meds won't fix. Surgeries dangerous. Maybe cancer. Maybe something else that isn't good, either. Not good.

And my mind is saying: too soon, too soon.

All of this is taking place during the week of Halloween, All Saints Day and All Souls Day. This is the week where some traditions end the year or begin to enter the time of endings.

This autumn is still warm. Trees are 2-3 weeks late in turning. There is a feeling that maybe we can fool winter. Maybe we can fool Death. Life goes on forever. Doesn't it?

Alas, our forms are always changing. Eventually, we  - every living thing - has a date with ending, ends, the end.

Samson. Beautiful Samson. You are still here for now. I am still here for now. Such gratitude for your gift of living with us. Such gratitude for your enormous, gentle soul.